Tech Talk: Gadgets and Gizmos

Up, Up and Away

Owning a personal airplane would be pretty sweet, and the ICON A5 makes that dream almost affordable. Besides looking incredible, the light aircraft can land on tarmac or water, the wings fold up for easy storage and it includes a parachute recovery system if things go all pear-shaped while cloud hopping. The craft’s designer used to fly F-16s so it’s engineered to get the most fun out of flying with a top speed of 138mph. Range is relatively short at 300 miles per tank of petrol, but your significant other’s shrieks of terror will probably bring you back down long before you’re running on fumes.

Price: RMB 892,000. Web: www.iconaircraft.com

Arise, Sir Nerf

Teach your child the lost tenets of chivalry by buying them a Nerf N-Force Marauder Long Sword. By bonking everybody and everything in their path with this durable foam sword, honour, valour and a spirit of charity will inevitably flourish. At school, they will share with classmates who forgot their bag lunch at home. At home, their fortitude to eat all of their vegetables will greatly increase. Manufacturer Hasbro also claims that horsemanship may be positively affected in some cases.

Price: RMB 175. Web: www.amazon.com

Bug-out Bag

Experts say those who survive the first 72 hours of the Zombie Apocalypse stand a better-than-even chance of living on to help repopulate the planet. The Guardian Deluxe Two-Person Kit won’t help you fend off your reanimated neighbours who have a taste for brains (think: guns, boards with nails sticking out, etc), but it will take care of everything else. The backpack includes water, purification tablets, food bars, radio, squeeze-rechargeable torch, compass, flint, matches, lighter, ponchos, body warmers, tent, knife, nylon rope, masks, hygiene and first aid kits and more.

Price: RMB 515. Web: www.urbansurvivaltools.com

Get Off My Lawn

Kids these days have no respect for their elders! Clenched fist in air, yelling at the little beasts, they only mock your feeble demands with high pitched laughter and embarrassingly accurate impressions. With this slick walking cane, take the fight to them! Not only will it steady your wobbly walk down the pavement, but the bottom portion houses a one-million volt stun gun that is sure to teach a lesson to even the most insolent scallywag. Plus, the cane is rechargeable and includes a built-in torch to help illuminate rapscallions by night.

Price: RMB 480. Web: www.trueswords.com